Someone explain to me
Why my purse is a hot mess
And what it is that scares
Me about myself
Someone help me reconcile
The life I predicted
With the life I want
With the life I love
It's one life, three perspectives--
Past
Future
Present
I get lost between the lines
But not tonight because
God is here
Explaining.
Why don't you go fall fly away Leave me on this island
While I drown beneath today
Information like storm clouds
Churning and burning cold
A ceiling between me and source
A cage thick as an eggshell
But strong as gold
Yearning for tomorrow and youth
At once
A paradox of impossibilities
They comes in flashes, the truth
We chip away at suffering
But all of this feels old--
Could we leave it behind
This yearning for our words to be sold?
Without condemning human kind
To a history that does not bear
The privilege of repeating
Nor believes
That a greater power does, in fact, care.
I am source / streaks of sunlight
Whatever makes our hearts beat / I am it
I exist not within boundaries / but around them
I am not the limits of the body / I am Holy Spirit
I quiver beneath the power that I am / but I do not crumble
I focus I fight I flounder / and I rise.
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my full moon super powers--
Fly. See all of creation from up there. Skip through space to embody unknown dimensions. Walk to the other side of this planet. Understand the nature of beauty. Feel history as it pulses under my skin. Read a book by picking it up. Traverse the highway of time. Float. Levitate. Hover. Become everyone at once. Speak without words. Communicate across blank spaces. Shapeshift. Tumble through clouds. Read my heart aloud. Hold conviction as strong as the ocean. See God in the looking glass. Memorize the map engraved upon the deepest layer of spirit. Live the loftiest existence of my soul's imagination. Catch my baby's cries with unconditional kisses. Hold them forever. Grant grandiose wishes with the wink of my eye. Erase conflict with the nod of my head. Become the wind. Exhale abundance. Hear the echoes of animals. Unpeel the scars of living. Disappear. Reappear. Remember. Turn inside out. Show my insides to the kindred. Love all the children. Breathe in the babies. The crown of each head. Wrap my arms around the ocean. Unwrap the meaning of now. Sit in the stillness of sun. Bloom. Keep faith between my fingers, always close to my fingertips. Intuit without doubting. Play life like a movie. Slow motion. Rewind. Fast forward. Repeat. Open. Heart, mind, soul. Of infinite boundaries.
Photo credit: Alisha Sommer
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A leaky faucet of truthtwist the knobs unplug the holes you can try but you can't stop the flow the flood of wisdom slick messes with no mercy. Watch where you step you are breakable like me don't close your eyes denial breeds dis-ease don't hide your heart isolation nurtures depression. Heed the coincidences for they do not exist feel your feelings not the emotional blackmail but the divine guidance the answers resting beneath bone and within blood arteries surging with the essence of your destiny.
Errant words of wisdom mosey through my mindStrutting like rhinestones, sparkling but weak I kiss them hello with lips that will curse them Roused by sincere reverence that fades by tomorrow.
I am no hypocrite. I am someone with dreams Smooth and supple on the inside, pretty on the outside Lungs crimson with blood rather than charred with Smoke and fire and tumors stocked with poison.
The church says to confess and repent and be healed But God already knows every heart I've broken, so I tell them to go to hell, they say I'm going there soon I say we might be here already.
There's no escaping destiny when it's contained by Sagebrush and juniper trees, tumbleweeds and desert breezes Stale motel rooms where a companion costs extra Even the pizza man if he comes in and shuts the door.
God does not want me to heal, God wants me to Bruise and bleed so I can slip out of this body and Into another. Maybe my soul was not ripe enough for now Maybe this valley leads to a mountain with a view.
When I climb out from under my skin, the scars will stay Dissolving with the defiled flesh of a hypocrite A liar, a thief, a charlatan, a childless mother. Everything temporary like this body I never learned to love.
I sleep not, rest notEat not, taste not Kiss not, love not Unless I'm with You
Take my fingers I know they're cold, let's Travel to panoramic views Where mountains float like Birds
I'll wait while you collect Souvenirs of this entanglement My wings flapping in rhythm With the cycles of the Moon
Once she's carried me home Turn your face towards heaven I'll return as a raindrop I'll caress your face with Water
There is no end to us As there was no beginning We exist as points upon the circle Repeating this infinite Loop.
Aim, throw, hit
Sharp
Pierces my chest
I shout but I sound like nothing
The walls are sound-proof, eye-proof
And escape-proof
Trapped forever within
Life's longing for itself.
Rolling across blades of grass
I pretend they are tippy tops of trees
And I am God's yellow face
The moon is my best friend
So I ask for the clouds to part
For the answers to crawl out of
Darkness, into somewhere bright
For interpretation.
My arms shield my eyes instead of
My chest which takes the blow
All bone and fragile tissue,
But not even sound-proof glass
Can stop me from seeing
Outside. Where nothing makes sense
Except for our stories and
The sun, but only when it shines.
"Hints of Heaven" by Lucy Miller Robinson
The sun breaks over the horizon Lighting up the billows The candy-colored sky, A strip of pale sunshine in water Quivers and reflects and glows Boundless like me. We are gradients of ice into light Blue becoming red, While the clouds grant us hints of heaven Always leaving Always coming.
A faint knock wakes me from my slumber. It’s much too early for visitors, the sun has yet to rise. I snuggle deeper under the thick blanket, alone and naked. But the tapping is persistent, so I give in to curiosity. Emerging from my lair, I wrap my shivering body in a fuzzy blue bathrobe.
I peer through the peephole and I see Hope. I open the door. She stands erect, in all her glory, eyes glistening like the morning dew. She brought the sun with her and she is illuminated, her white-blonde hair creating a halo around her unblemished face.
“You’re here early today,” I say, rubbing my eyes. I forgot to grab my glasses and her edges are blurring into the light.
“I heard you calling for me in your sleep. You had a nightmare,” she says.
“I did?”
She smiles at me like a mother comforting a child who has fallen onto the unforgiving concrete.
“Rejection is coming for you, my dear.”
“He is?” My heart beats faster. “What should I do?”
“He’ll try to get in any way he can. His face will be covered.” Her smile has given way to a frown.
“Should I keep my windows closed always?”
“Leave them open during the day, allow the fresh air in. But after the sun sets, keep them locked. Rejection can only attack those in the dark. ”
“What about my dreams?”
“He cannot hurt your dreams, he can only bring fear. But don’t give up, my darling. No matter how many times he comes. Thank him for thinking of you and tell him you’re not interested.”
“What happens if he gets in?”
“There’s a chance he will slip in when you open the door to step outside. It won’t be your fault. He’s quicker than a thunder cloud and smaller than a rain drop. If he gets in, you call me. I’ll be there.”
Hope is fading into a cloud.
“Don’t forget about me, darling. I’m always here for you.”
The cloud lifts and the sun shines brighter now, so bright that I must close my eyes. When I open them, she is gone.
Adapted from my other blog.
I am a mother. Ailed by my children. Deserted by my husband. Abandoned by the angels.
But mother, you are perfect.
I am a little girl. Kicked by my mother. Ignored by my father. Raped by my teacher.
But little girl, you are perfect.
I am an old woman. Forsaken by love. Alone by death. Hopeless by life.
But old woman, you are perfect.
How can I go on?
Drink your tears Let sorrow metastasize into joy. Heed the lesson Turn your face towards the sun.
Abandonment makes room for love, Abuse undresses the ugly. Without a valley There's no view from the mountain.
You were born perfect Steeped in a cup of grace. Painted by the devas Kissed by the breath of life.
